Okay I know I just posted, it was morning for me, and now tonight I am posting again. I just really feel like sharing how I am feeling, which is a mix of many emotions and thoughts . . .
Its pouring out, and our boys did not come home all day, meaning that they are out in the cold right now. They are probably in the mud somewhere, because Uganda gets muddy in the rain. I keep hearing the gate and my heart jumps at the idea that my boys are home, but they don't come. I can't help but crying as I write this- I am heartbroken. Please, please pray that God moves in their hearts and brings them back to us.
Tomorrow, me and Abby are going craft shopping and spending the day together. I have been so blessed by her and our friendship. I am the kind of person who needs someone that I am CLOSE to, like, really good friends. When I left for Uganda, I did not know who that person would be, but I knew God would provide me with someone. That amazing girl is Abby. She is so wise, and fun to be with, and compassionate, and our hearts for the kids look very similar. I love working with her, but mostly I love being her friend, and thinking about the future of our friendship in Uganda fills me with joy.
I hate change. I hate the unfamiliar. I hate building my life in Uganda, and still living one in the US. It leaves me discontented and torn. I know that God has a plan, and I see Him moving the pieces into place, its just my timing is off. Whenever God is about to bring me into a new situation, I always resist. Its like He is urging me toward a great cliff, promising to catch me, but I dig in my heals. And then, there is always a moment when God moves not just in my life, but in my heart. Then, all the sudden I am ready. I know that before I go, as I pray and take comfort in my return, God will bring my heart to that point. I will still be sad, because the little loves of my life are staying here, but I will be ready. Not just ready to give into His plans, but ready to run and jump off, because even in my fear I know He will catch me.
Its pouring out, and our boys did not come home all day, meaning that they are out in the cold right now. They are probably in the mud somewhere, because Uganda gets muddy in the rain. I keep hearing the gate and my heart jumps at the idea that my boys are home, but they don't come. I can't help but crying as I write this- I am heartbroken. Please, please pray that God moves in their hearts and brings them back to us.
Tomorrow, me and Abby are going craft shopping and spending the day together. I have been so blessed by her and our friendship. I am the kind of person who needs someone that I am CLOSE to, like, really good friends. When I left for Uganda, I did not know who that person would be, but I knew God would provide me with someone. That amazing girl is Abby. She is so wise, and fun to be with, and compassionate, and our hearts for the kids look very similar. I love working with her, but mostly I love being her friend, and thinking about the future of our friendship in Uganda fills me with joy.
I hate change. I hate the unfamiliar. I hate building my life in Uganda, and still living one in the US. It leaves me discontented and torn. I know that God has a plan, and I see Him moving the pieces into place, its just my timing is off. Whenever God is about to bring me into a new situation, I always resist. Its like He is urging me toward a great cliff, promising to catch me, but I dig in my heals. And then, there is always a moment when God moves not just in my life, but in my heart. Then, all the sudden I am ready. I know that before I go, as I pray and take comfort in my return, God will bring my heart to that point. I will still be sad, because the little loves of my life are staying here, but I will be ready. Not just ready to give into His plans, but ready to run and jump off, because even in my fear I know He will catch me.
Caitlyn-
ReplyDeleteThanks for keeping us posted! I'm praying for you as you say 'see you later' to your kids and friends in Kampala and begin your journey back to Davis. God grant you strength, peace, and joy as you remember all that He has done this summer and all that He will continue to do when you return to the USA and return to Uganda in a few months time.
See you soon!
-kevin