Lessons in Love

There was a time when I thought I knew a lot about love. Believed I knew what it felt like to love someone in a selfless way, or even to be in love. The thing I have been learning though, over the past few months, is that love is always expanding, never staying in one place. This, I think, is because God’s love is so infinite and big that no matter how much we think we understand, in our humanness, we only see/feel/ know a fraction of His all encompassing love. And so the more we experience God, and His Divine love, the more our understanding of love itself grows. There will never be a time when I know all things about love, because God is love. Its a mystery, and my understanding of it will always be pushed, stretched, even broken and then rebuilt. This is the verse that is currently shaping my understanding of love...

      “  Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things,                                      endures all things.” 1 Cor 13:7

What is this verse ultimately saying about love? What so many millions of poems and love songs, movies and art have been proclaiming for thousands of years! Love is NOT overrated. It is both simple, and extremely complex. It is at the core of our being, our creation. It is the thing we are made to experience, and the most powerful aspect of human interactions. Love is profound. Love is grand. Love IS divine.

Love tells me that I am to “bear all things”. When my kids are pushing me to the brink of exhaustion and back, I will bear it. When they are breaking my heart with running away, I will bear it. No matter what God calls me to do, what this ministry goes through, what battles are waged against us, I will bear it.

Love claims I will “believe all things”. When everyone tells me a certain child will never change, love believes he can. When this work tests my faith, draws me out on a wire far above where I was comfortable standing, love shouts “believe in God’s ultimate power!”. Believe in the power of love... God’s love, and my own. Believe that love can heal whatever looks too far broken. Believe that love can bring together what seems impossible. Believe in the power of our God.

Love demands that I hope all things- never loose hope. Never loose sight of what I am doing here, the vision that God has called me towards. Never loose hope in His great plans, or hope in His ultimate victory. Never loose hope that He is working, no matter what circumstances I am facing, or how hard the situation appears.

Finally friends, love endures all things.

en·dur·ance 
/enˈd(y)o͝orəns/

NOUN

1. The fact or power of enduring an unpleasant or difficult process or situation without giving way.
2. The capacity of something to last or to withstand wear and tear.

This, for me, is by far the most powerful claim that love makes. It endures all things! That word, endures, is so strong. Its the power to “withstand wear and tear”. Its the power to stay strong and not give way. This claim love makes, to endure all things (not some but all things, mind you) its powerful. Hello, what does this say about love? What we should know always but sometimes forget.. love is STRONG. Stronger than our understanding. Stronger than our own faith or bodies. Love is another great paradox. It makes us weaker than anything else, breaks our hearts and tests our faith, then turns around to endures more than anything else. It can do so because its so strong, and in our weakness, we become stronger.

Amen

Wow... its been a long time! Sorry everyone; sometimes life just gets in the way of blogging. This has been a roller coaster of a summer (I still cannot believe its July. It still feels like May!!).

First, its our “team season” which means  that we have been hosting a lot of great groups from America. These groups are the backbone of our ministry as far as giving goes. They are the ones that spread word of what we are doing after they get back to the USA. The team that is here at the moment has been a special blessing (both to the ministry and to me personally). They are SO flexible and have been serving with us in any way they can. They are also just super fun to be around, and a few of them have become good friends. I am really thankful that God is using them in such big ways to bless us this month (thanks team!).

Second, more importantly, we have two new additions to our family! I don’t know where I last left off, but (really sadly) Joseph and Waswa ran away about a month ago. After a lot of heartbreak and prayer, I came to the decision that they were just not ready to be in Joseph’s House. You can continue to pray for them, as they are still very precious in my heart and I refuse to give up on them. After they left, we spent about a month with just three boys (Alex, Sabote and Enoch). That time was spent really settling those boys- making sure they were completely stable and secure in the home. Last week, I decided that they were finally ready to bring other boys home.

On Saturday last week, we brought home Joshua and Robert. These two boys are best friends and have been in our programs for the past two years. They are both super sweet, but wild. But they are good kids who have hearts that want to please. I had been praying hard about who to bring home next, and I really felt like out of all the kids I knew, these two fit the criteria for J House the best. They had been rejected from other homes. They had been on the streets a long time. They are misunderstood, wild, and totally irresistible. I felt God place them on my heart, but wanted to watch them carefully to make sure I had listened for His word correctly. Finally, I felt God telling me it was time.

Like always, when the moment came to bring them home, I felt worried. What if they disrupted the stability of our house? What if they run away? What if they cause fighting or hurt the other boys? What if we (or I) just cannot handle them?? I am supposed to be their mother, and that love has to be bigger than all things. It has to come from God, because I am not perfect and neither is my love. But God’s love is perfect, and so it is only through Him that I can do this. Still, there is always that moment when I worry that God is not with me in this- maybe I am alone. Fortunately, God knows my heart. He knows my worries, and He knows who belongs in our home. It became obvious almost instantly after getting Robert and Joshua home that they were meant to be part of our family. Turns out that Enoch and Joshua are really good friends, and that Joshua is a great influence on Enoch (having Joshua around has really helped Enoch’s behavior). Robert is friends with everyone, and has been an all around joy to have. But beyond that, they are truly amazing boys.

Robert is so happy all the time. He brings a lighthearted joy to our home that is uniquely his. He is a very giving friend, and though he has trouble concentrating, he really does listen well. He is also very smart, and has been an encouragement to the other boys in their school work. He is always helping them with their homework, showing them correct spellings and helping them answer math problems. He LOVES being read to, and has been bringing us closer as a group by insisting on “family reading” each night after devotions (this consists of me reading a story to the boys with Sam or Eddy translating).

Joshua is incredible too. I don’t know how we missed it at the programs, really I don’t. To be honest, when I first met Joshua I had insisted in my heart that he should NEVER be in one of our homes. He had poor boundaries and was really wild, and I felt very strongly that he would be a bad influence on the kids. Even when starting Joseph’s House I didn’t consider him. But God saw Joshua in ways I didn’t, and He opened my eyes. Joshua is the sweetest boy in our house (maybe besides Sabote). He helps set the table and clean the dishes every night (even when its not his turn). He leads in devotions. He kneels for me when I get home in the evenings (this is a cultural sign of respect, and is considered good manners. He is my only boy to do this consistently and without being asked). He never fights, always respects, always listens. Yes, he gets a little carried away with playing or being silly sometimes, but if you really tell him to do something, it is his hearts desire to please you.

On top of all that, the boys together are just fun to be with. Like I said, they both bring a certain joy to the house. They have brought the other boys tighter as a group, not torn them or divided them. They have a positive influence on the other boys. I am so thankful that God revealed His heart for these boys to me. I am so blessed that He has entrusted them (really all my boys) to my care. I do not deserve to be the mother of such wonderful kids.

When doing this work, you experience God’s extremes. His deep and grieving heartbreak for the broken things. His power and majesty through healing and miracles. His overwhelming and totally engulfing love for His children. I am thankful for this work. For the burden of heartbreak for God’s children. For the power of His love, which He has opened my eyes to see. And for Him, because above all things, God is beautiful, and everything beautiful reflects God.

For You be the Kingdom and the power and the glory, forever and   ever. Amen.